I was requested to save the eulogy I spoke for others to read. I thought that I would post it here for those who would like to read it for themselves as it was meant to be said. I get nervous in frontof crowds and start to skip through what is written subconsciously trying to get to the end so I can bury my head in a plant and hide.
My Fathers Eulogy
Good Morning.
Yesterday as my family and I sat down to dinner we took the time to open some of the wonderful cards of encouragement and sympathy that friends and family had left for us.
One card caught the eye of me and my brother John.
It asks the reader to consider this question;
Think of how birth must seem to a child. Passing from the only world it has known, the womb, to the great unkown world outside. Then it asks the reader to consider death and points out that it, death, is the same as birth.
In birth we transition from our comfortable existence in the womb into the loving arms of our mother and father.
In death we transition from our comfortable existence of the life we have lived here on earth into the loving arms of G-d.
For me that is all that has taken place with my father, Marvin Marion Henkins. He has not died. He has been born into the arms of G-d, that is all.
Here on earth we have created many measures upon which we measure men.
For some, it is a bank account.
For others, it is a statue.
For my father, it was his children and work.
Alone with my father he would tell me how proud he was of my siblings and I.
Often he would tell me how proud he was of Heather, Dan, Eric, and John. At work when he spoke to co-workers, he would beam with pride as he spoke of them.
Others here to honor him will tell you, Heather, Dan, Eric, and John the same.
The words may not have been said directly to you by him, but know they were said often beyond your ears.
Maria he adored. As he lay in bed at the hospice he would often speak of you. He loved you dearly, as the rest of us. Sometimes though I wonder if maybe, if it is possible, to love someone too much. But I think Dad managed too. You gave him three wonderful children known in family circles as " the boys".
When someone dies we often look for signs they leave us to tell us they are still with us and are O.K. We often will also take small tokens they leave behind to hold as memories.
I have my token, a coin.
I have my sign as well. My brothers and sister.
It is hard to look at you and not see Dad in you, or I for that matter.
Being the sons and daughter of Marvin Henkins, we have many qualities of him that people admired.
1)Stubbornness
2)Determination
3)Hard Working
4)Honesty
Yes, once a Henkins puts his mind to a task everyone knows it will get done.
Whether it be out of stubbornness, shear determination, or hard work, the task will be completed. It may get ugly, making others watching cringe, but it will get done.
As for honesty, we just are.
Ask a Henkins for an honest opinion, you will get it.
Don't ask a Henkins for an honest opinion, you still are going to get it.
For friends of my father, and those who worked with him, they all, every one of them, will mention how hard he worked.
In his toolbox I found pictures of the family in variuos stages of our lives. Also inside, buried under various papers and notes, were two pictures of him.
One was of him in the standard pose looking at the camera thinking "Are you done Yet"
The other was of him on a fork truck, taken from the side and behind, him driving away,the image blurred from motion.
Is there any doubt as to which shot Dad would have chosen to represent him?
In closing I would like to say thank you from my family and I for all the love and support all have offered us.
Whenever you see a cribbage board, hear a dart "thump" against a dart board, a horse shoe "clang" against its post, or a NASCAR race roar, think of him. But mostly whenever you see a person working hard, doing the best they can with the talents G-d gave them, think of him.
Marvin Marion Henkins
Proud husband.
Proud father.
Proud man.
Love you Dad.
